For the Love of Shelby & Dela

“Intuition is not a single way of knowing - it's our ability to hold space for uncertainty and our willingness to trust the many ways we've developed knowledge and insight, including instinct, experience, faith and reason.” ~ 

Brené Brown

What makes someone drive down a rugged mountain road, never having done so before, yet compelled to. Only then, to discover someone who has been trapped for days, under a vehicle. The mother, who is exhausted of her daily duties, puts her children for a nap and is about to join them. Yet she feels drawn into the kitchen, to discover their home is on fire and manages to escape, with those most precious to her.

A single person, on their way home to the grocery store near them, is prompted to drive across several lanes of traffic; to stop in at another chain store for some unknown reason. She encounters a weary stranger, whose husband has just been released from hospital, after having surgery for a pacemaker. 
After discovering the couple have been waiting for a taxi, over an hour…she offers to provide a ride home. The vehicle she drives, belongs to her landlord, who is away. 
This woman, who does not have any transportation of her own, is about to embark on a journey. One, where her intuition of listening to her heart, will soon reap eight months of unexpected adventures, blessings and life lessons.

While the first two are examples of intuition, the last one is my own personal experience of what happens, when the spirit leads.

I encountered Dela and her husband Robert, in unplanned circumstances.  
When as strangers we met, no one could foresee the ripple effect.

After explaining the vehicle I was driving was not mine, I shared I did not own any transportation.

Upon dropping off the thankful couple, I saw the street sign had the word ‘angel,’ in it.

Dela gave me their home number and asked me to call her once I made it back home, as the roads were icy. I had already experienced some harrowing moments on the highway, after leaving the airport, where my landlord was flying to balmy Florida.

I thought it was sweet of the lady to make such a request. 

Once safely back at my residence, I called and we spoke. Dela thanked me again for my kindness. She let me know, we would speak again.

A week or so later, I did receive a call. It was from the church I was attending. The secretary shared, how a lady named Dela, had called for my number as it had not been saved on her phone. Previously, I shared with several people from church, about my chance meeting, with the couple. 
Dela had paid attention to me sharing about being a Christian and attending service in the area, where I lived. This would be the first indication this situation was being orchestrated by a higher power.

When we spoke again, Dela suggested we meet for coffee at Tim Horton’s.

More time passed and as we sat together in a booth, sipping coffee’s, I was not prepared for what her purpose was in our meeting.

Dela spoke of her Toyota Echo vehicle and how since I did not have anything to drive, would I be interested in carsharing?

I had a dumb founded look upon my face, yet Dela stated her offer was serious and legitimate.

I could not wrap my thoughts around what she was suggesting.

“What do you mean car share?” I asked perplexed.

Dela went on to explain how she has shared her car in the past, with another person.

She would ensure everything was done properly through ICBC and I could use her car on a trial basis. Besides the enormous blessing, Dela would cover the cost of insurance, help with gas and maintain any repairs.

Now, I will admit I expected some hidden cameras to be capturing such a scene, as my mouth couldn’t say a yes or no.

Dela could sense my reluctance and reassured me, she was simply wanting to help someone in need, who had shown compassion to two strangers.

Once the disbelief wore off, I realized her offer was genuine.

In accepting her generosity, my life was set onto a different direction.

When I sat behind the wheel of her car, I recall asking if the car had a name?

I am fond of naming my vehicles and some of them have been cheeky.

Dela said the car was named Shelby.

My time with Shelby saw me embark on many of a venture, which Dela gladly encouraged. Had I been to Francis/King Regional Park or checked out the circular walking paths behind many of the older, local churches, she asked. 

The opportunities afforded to me now, were endless. I went on picnics, overlooking the vast blue waters, surrounding our area. I hiked alongside mountain alpine flowers. Shelby took me to Island Regional Park. There I watched the cool darkness, become fragmented, by earth’s light in a sunrise. 

"To live the life you love, you must do what you love. And you can't choose what you love, you can only discover it." ~ Barbara Sher 

On an extended road trip, I drove to the outskirts of Duncan, to the Ocean Falls Reunion of the Rain People. I reunited with the three sisters, who are part of the wonderful inspiration for my novel, Under the Sitka Tree. I was able to have the vehicle, as a means of free advertising, for my novel. The endless streams of people who have checked out what UTST is about, has come from them seeing the magnets on the back of Shelby.

*Please Note: the WEBSITE was changed to:
tlaltondesign.com

Having a reliable and gas efficient car, allowed me to stay for a weekend at the Hi-Point Guest Ranch (Bed and Breakfast).

At ȽÁU, WELṈEW̱/ John Dean Provincial Park, I trekked along the dirt paths to Pickles Bluff and sat on a boulder, while a swarm of dragonflies kept me company. 

For entertainment, Shelby was my ‘limo’ to see Corey Hart and Glass Tiger in concert. I was treated to another weekend of celebrating cultural roots, with those who were part of, the Indigenous Festival.

When my aunt passed away from cancer, I was able to go to Florence lake and play one of her favourite songs, on my playlist. As I stretched out on the pier, my thoughts reflected on the short timeline of life. 

There have been many trips to Goldstream Provincial Park, including sharing in a traditional meal, with a wonderful Australian family. My eyes saw waterfalls, while my ears heard the songbirds, along the seaside. Some places became a favourite, like Swan Lake Sanctuary, Rithet’s Bog and the splendour of The Horticulture Centre of the Pacific.

Another place I enjoyed going to, was the Sidney Market, on Thursday nights. I had driven out to the area one night and sat in awe of the kaleidoscope of fireworks, over the ocean. The company who joined me, had stories and a smile that welcomed you in. As we watched the sky erupt in flares of colour, I crossed off another thing on my list…Watch fireworks with a stranger.

Source: Ocean 98.5 FM 

On a different night, the lure of handmade pottery and carved wood, drew me into a booth. After a few conversations and an invite to visit a breathtaking log home in Lake Cowichan, I would find myself involved with the wood carver. I soon forgot the purpose of the original meeting – to have something created out of wood. Shelby carried me through the windy roads where cedar, fir and birch greeted me, with their natural beauty. In my many trips along the way, I knew in my heart that what I was pursuing, was not the path God wanted me on. Later, at the end of the relationship, I was given a gift from the wood carver. It held the purpose of meeting him and was linked to another individual, with a connection to the past. 

A key role in my work as a caregiver, saw Shelby transport the elderly couple I looked after. In taking them to various appointments, I am deeply grateful for the means to transfer them safely in a car. Had I never been driving; it would not allow me to help them in such a way. I was also able to pick up supplies needed and arrive to work in a timely fashion. With all the transit strikes and routes cancelled daily, I have been blessed to know that a trustworthy means of transportation, was afforded to me.

Dela’s generosity went beyond the car and into the abundance of crocheted items she has donated to me. Known as The Railway Knitter, she has given me bags full of her handiwork, to give to those in need on the streets of Victoria.

 I recall a time she invited me into her home. Dela proudly shared with a daughter’s love for her father, the ribbons of fabric, attached with knitted flowers. Each one she created, represented a birthday year of her dad. This beautifully structured art, was made with such warmth and adoration.

Dela Wilkins, Tunisian Expert of The Crochet Crowd, is an accomplished author of two Tunisian publications. Also known as the Railway Knitter, she occasionally teaches on VIA Rail across Canada as part of the on-board entertainment program. Tunisian is a journey of creativity she’s happy to share. To get on board the Tunisian crochet train you need… Basic knowledge of Tunisian crochet: simple stitch, forward pass and return pass. Dela’s booklet Railway Knitting provides information on the basic stitches. Source. Shannon (Creative Festival)

Last month, when I was at Ogden Point watching a glorious sunset slip over the horizon, I was approached by a young man named Jaz.

He came up beside me and mentioned the stunning scenery that was before us. While we did engage in conversation, it was the time of quietude between us that I revelled in. For it was about sharing in the tranquil moment that mattered. Standing together, I thought of another thing being crossed off my list…Watch a marvelous sunset, with a stranger.

Later in conversation, Jaz mentioned to me a unique tree swing that overlooked Shawnigan Lake. Had I ever seen it? I thought about what a tree swing meant to my late daughter Shayla and how one of her favourite songs was “Swing Life Away,” by Rise Against. I shook my head indicating I had never been there. 
Jaz assured me that one day soon, I would.

Two weeks later, I was on another adventure.

I met Jaz at Goldstream Provincial Park. I had to leave Shelby behind, as she was not meant to drive over the Malahat, without winter tires. Jaz drove us along to the start of the trail and parked. One look at the incline and I was in doubt of my abilities to take part in the climb. What I did not know was the beginning of the path, was nowhere near indicative of what lay head. As rocks, roots, and moss-covered boulders were in abundance, what transpired on the way up, had me thanking God I was in safe, capable hands. 
For every step along the way, Jaz patiently waited for me. Never once did he complain of my many stops, to catch my breathe. When we approached the crags and deep roots, he went before me and kindly offered me his hand. If a step needed navigating, Jaz jumped ahead to ensure it was safe. Being the size I am, I know at some parts, it was not easy and yet…still I heard no objections from him. 

Upon reaching our destination, I was overwhelmed. To see the tree swing in person, was something that even now has me tear up. 

There was a plaque I read:

“The swing was built for his future wife, on a very special mountaintop. Swing 2.0 was built to last a lifetime of adventures! He wrote, Thanks for loving it, as much as I love her!”

After a push off the rocks, I let my legs gain some air and soon I was swinging. 

Jaz mentioned how it was too bad I could not see the view, yet for me it did not matter, as it had been more about the climb.
I took out a photograph of my daughter and myself, which Shayla had given me for Mother’s Day that read: “I Love You to the Moon and Back.”

As I held a picture of Shayla and I, Jaz took a snapshot of me on the swing. 
I  had also brought with me, something to leave behind. A golden, painted heart with a key inserted in the back, with the words I would tell my daughter: “You are my sunshine.”
This was gifted to me a long time ago and now I felt it was perfect for its release, under the tree swing.

In all of this, I began to feel the tears coming.

Jaz asked me if I needed a few minutes by myself and I shook my head no.

As we went to descend the mountain, Jaz took me down an easier way; a nice slope that surely would have been easier to climb.

I asked why we did not go that way up?

He smiled and replied, “It would not have been the same.”

Nearing his truck, something made me realize the profound truth of what this all meant.

In the nearly six years of living on the Island, Jaz was the only man who never took anything from me. He had no expectations and was in the true sense, a gentleman.

While these times shared were memorable, this was not the beginning of anything romantic. For I believe Jaz came into my life, as a reminder of goodness and that I can trust what my instincts are. 
I continue to pray for Jaz to find the happiest he deserves. I am thankful for his kindness; to a mother missing her only child. 

Driving back to Shelby, I smiled as I thought of crossing off my list:

Climb a mountainside with a 'stranger', to sway on a tree swing.

The time came on November 15^th, to pass over the keys to Dela for her Shelby. I was privileged to having driven the Toyota Echo and the memories made.

Both Dela and I have an understanding that the car was an extension of so much more. 

I have found a cherished friend, who offers guidance, support and encouragement. 

I am fortunate, for all that has come, from the use of her vehicle.

There is also a peace in knowing, I did heed my inner guidance. When one cold, winter night, two strangers needed me... I believe our Creator knew, I needed them just as much.

With a warrior's spirit I continue to strive, to seek and even falter. In being open to listening to my heart and complete strangers, I disperse the seeds of kindness to others and in return, I receive.

While in my serving...I grow.

by TL Alton

Priceless Overcomer

Ogden Point, Victoria, BC 

Our scars are unique to us; they lead you to people they are meant to find.

Leaning onto the railing of Ogden Point, my senses are inundated with vivid hues, brackish surf and the frondescence of autumn.  The perfect balance of nature whispers its brilliance, as the sun sets over the ocean. In the distance, a lone figure approaches me. Over the next hour, I am immersed in conversation with another seeker of life. At one point we stand in silence, as the landscape is turned into a palette of featured rich colours, which require our attention. 

Later, driving away, I am mulling over the word anchor and the playfulness of it that can have opposite meanings. Either it can convey being weighed down or how someone can become emotionally attached in your life.

To let yourself be affixed to another, is to place your heart in a risky situation. When letting someone into your personal space, you open yourself up to being rejected. In offering love, the saying goes… the more you give, the more you risk losing.

What about the anchors, once fastening us to someone that become abruptly ripped away? Do we learn to accept, adapt and merge into the new form of who we are, or do we let ourselves fade away, along with our tears?

There are people, who behind their beautiful silhouettes, are stitched together souls.

Christian artist Mandisa found herself being tired of trying to remain strong, after the loss of her friend, Lakisha Mitchell, who died of breast cancer. The Overcomer singer made the choice to slip away into the shadows. Mandisa ignored God, as she struggled to understand how Lakisha could have been taken, one year after giving birth to her second child. She quit attending church and her Bible remained unopened. It was the crippling depression that removed Mandisa from the music industry. Along with it, came back the 120 pounds she worked hard to lose. Spiralling down, was a despair that left her feeling hopeless.

When I selected Mandisa’s latest CD, Out of the Dark, I could not imagine the honesty of her words that bore straight into me. On the back cover of the inside pamphlet are the following comments from the singer:

“Shame and insecurity weighed me down, and suicidal thoughts tried to overtake me in that dark pit. Thankfully, it only takes a flicker of light to dispel the darkness…Today, I don’t have all the answers…but I am learning to trust in who God is, more than my need to understand everything. He can work through all things, including the things the enemy intends for harm, He uses for good.”

Now, as I play Mandisa’s song list, it is something I can relate too. This disclosure of hers, prompted me to research Christian artists, who because of tragedy became stronger in their faith.

In writing my post, I would also discover, how my life would be intertwined with strangers; each who have their own voice of truth.

At the beginning of November, I attended the concert For King & Country. It was an event full of energy, a multitude of instruments played, and a set list fueled by worship. 

Previously, I gifted the extra ticket to a stranger, who I found was celebrating her birthday on the night of November 2^nd. I would later hear from Danielle at the concert. She was with her friend, who had bought a ticket. I received the following message:

“Thank you so much! It would not have been possible without your generous gift!

It has been so amazing!”

I smiled and looking up, whispered my gratitude again, thanking God the person I once dated, had let me go. For there has only been an abundance of blessings come from it.

Inside the concert, I sang along with those attending, a sold-out show. One of the songs that resonates with me is Priceless, as it is connected to a movie of the same name. Joel Smallbone (part of the band duo) is in the film about sexual trafficking. The story-line gives a voice to take a stand against exploitation of those most vulnerable.

There is a Priceless necklace that I bought which says: “SHE’S WORTH FIGHTING FOR.”

Where my Priceless necklace rests before wearing it

It prompted me to think of the damage that can be done, to control someone, when words are used as weapons.  This is a quote on the wall of where I was staying.

During the band’s performances, Luke Smallbone walked out on the stage and spoke of a former health crisis, Ulcerative Colitis, which saw him almost lose his life. Him and his wife, Courtney, also experienced the trauma of their 2- month- old son, Leo, nearly dying from Sudden Death Syndrome. Adding to their trials, was Luke’s wife Courtney who had survived Lemierre’s Syndrome when she was 18. Years later, when she was 7 months pregnant with their second child, Courtney became addicted to anti-nausea medication. Her anxiety was coupled with PTSD and she was overwhelmed with guilt and fear, given who her husband is, in the Christian music industry.

Listening to Luke speak, you could see the emotions he was overcome with. He shared how he left a show in Texas, to come back home to be with his wife, who had called frantic and asked him to come home right away. After checking his wife into a mental health facility as an outpatient for therapy, the Smallbone family united. When they were at their most vulnerable, they turned to their faith and trusted in God to see them through every set of painful circumstances. Courtney shared how her shame became unravelled. For King and Country’s album called “Burn the Ships.” It is about these life altering experiences and how in life we cannot go back, so we need to burn the ships, which link us to our past.

Before I left for this memorable night, I found myself at Island Regional Park, to watch the sunrise at 7 am. 

Island View Regional Park

Sitting on my driftwood bench crafted by nature, I noticed a woman and her son scouring the beach. I wondered if they had lost something. Turned out, they were looking for painted rocks, with various designs that has become a popular trend. The concept is to paint rocks and hide them for others to find. As families go rock-hounding, it is bringing people together and outside where the real beauty is. The mom soon introduced herself as Tina and her son, Benjamin. He had found a lovely, colourful stone. In my coffee mug, I also had a pebble I had been hanging onto for 10 years. I discovered it at Boundary Bay, as I walked the shoreline with someone. I asked Benjamin if he would like it and his eyes lit up when he read the date on it.

Life is like that…when something is meant to be released, it will find a way.

Soon after, as the crimson glow of the sunrise was beginning to form, I noticed a lady with a professional camera, capturing the moment. There was a stillness to her, with a peace that drew me in. When I introduced myself, our conversation flowed easily. I discovered Cindy’s business is called Sea Salt Photography. We talked about our passions and then she divulged about her surviving cancer. I was moved by what Cindy spoke of with me. As the waves rushed upon the pebbled beach, I could tell there was more to her story, beyond the lens.

When I went back home to my researching, I read of other musicians’ journey with grief. Steven Curtis Chapman and his wife Beth lost their 5-year-old daughter Maria Sue. She was tragically killed, when her brother driving the family’s SUV, accidentally ran over her. As they gathered in love and hope, instead of blame and anger, a place was created in Maria’s memory:

“Maria’s Big House of Hope was named in honor of Maria Sue Chapman, the daughter of Show Hope founders, Mary Beth and Steven Curtis Chapman. Six years after Maria’s death, her legacy continues to transform the lives of orphans with special needs. The sights and sounds of laughing children that echo throughout the hallways of Maria’s Big House of Hope, are very much a glimpse of God’s redemption…of his bringing beauty from ashes.”

Another story of resilience is Jason Weaver, lead singer for the band, Big Daddy Weave. Jason who has diabetes, became ill with an infection, which severely weakened his body's immune system. This prevented his body’s ability to stave off the infection and resulted in the amputation of both of his feet. In August of 2016, Jason appeared with his band on stage, at Christian Music Broadcasters Momentum Conference. Big Daddy Weave received the "Rich Mullins Impact Award."

We Are Messengers have retold their brush with death, many times. The tour bus they were travelling on, crashed into a vehicle parked on a dark road, with no lights on. Sadly, the person was killed instantly. Band members were still inside their tour bus when it caught on fire. Suddenly, the bus door flew open on its own, as the flames erupted. They all should have perished yet continue to give accounts of their survival.

Time and time again, in my continued research, I read of how Christian singers and their band members endured loss, addictions, abuse and painful encounters. Each one of them, have turned their life lessons, into testimony.

I thought of my own experiences, whereas a result of choices made, I have become stronger. Yet, I do not forget the times where instead of walking in the light, I have demanded in the dark…where I have held myself captive in places, I had no right to go.

Being a Christian, does not entitle me to a pass. If anything, I am sought after that much more by the darkness and everyday, I must keep the light in my lantern ablaze.

 I am reminded of Luke Smallbone asking the audience, on the night of the concert:

“Are there ships you need to burn in your life? What from your past has kept you silent and held you back from freedom?”  

by TL Alton